3 Steps To Manifest Your Dream Relationship
When I was growing up I felt horribly lonely.
I never fitted in.
It didn’t matter what school I went to or later what job I was in. There was always this feeling of being the outsider.
And I suffered terribly because of this lack of acceptance and belonging.
After years of soul searching, I finally realised I was missing ONE crucial ingredient.
A successful relationship with myself.
I never accepted myself fully and thus didn’t feel like I belonged anywhere…not even inside my own body. I was always wanting something other than what I had – irrespective of how I looked, how much money I made, who my Partner was.
In the last 4 years though, I’ve drastically changed this through some crucial steps.
And guess what’s happened?
I’ve cultivated the best relationships of my life.
How are these related you might be wondering?
Here’s the secret…
Your relationship with yourself is the cornerstone of every relationship in your life
What you say to yourself, how kind you are or how critical and judgmental you are — will be reflected in the way you treat others and how they treat you.
Now I know you might be thinking, “I do have a good relationship with myself.” I get my hair done, my nails, a massage every now and then…
Yes those things are nice but they won’t make a dent in your long term. They won’t improve your underlying self worth as they’re temporary fixes.
In order to improve the relationship with yourself, you have to go deeper than that. Here’s 3 sure fire steps:
- Start journalling – even if it’s just 5 mins a day and you bullet point what happened, what/who you got triggered by (fired up by), how that made you feel and what resulting things you said to yourself or behaviours you did. After a while, you may start to notice some patterns of your reactions and how you continue to hurt yourself by going over and over the same stories in your mind – hours, weeks or months after they’ve actually happened. This is self inflicted suffering well after someone or something has hurt you.
- Mirror work – Look in the mirror every day and say 3 nice things to yourself. In the beginning this might feel weird and hard. But it will get easier over time and ultimately – if you can’t stand to say nice things to yourself, how can you expect anyone else to?
- Meditate – Begin with 5 mins a day and work your way up to 20 minutes (10mins in the morning and 10 mins in the evening). This will calm down your over active mind and help you to relax. Once your mind is relaxed, it will naturally become less negative. Less negative towards you and others. After some time, you’ll begin to notice that you can catch your negative thoughts more quickly and easily and stop them in their tracks. This changes your entire energetic vibration, how you feel and how others feel towards you. It’s my magic bullet!
Implementing these small steps into my life has been an absolute game changer. BUT – you’ll want to do them consistently. Don’t worry if you fall off the band wagon for a day or a week, just START AGAIN as soon as you can. Each time you start again, you’re strengthening your mental muscle and moving closer to a better relationship with yourself.
Through the law of attraction – what you put out is what you get back. Healthy relationship with ourself attracts healthy relationships with others.
I hope you find these exercises as powerful as I have.
Walking beside you.
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